The Upper Crust

1003 Pittwater Road COLLOROY
Phone 99715182

Review originally posted on the 19th of August 2003


Mentioning the Upper Crust’s alfresco eating areas might ingenuously calm any hostile sentiment felt by hearing that it’s merely a pie shop. For those of you affected with such an inflated view of things, certainly, there are cast-iron tables and chairs sitting upon the paved entrance, plus trestle seating and cross-sections of logs that are used for tables on the front lawn. I sat there recently, dreamily remembering my past summers. If I subtract both the garden furniture and about thirty years, then add a creaking fly-screen door for atmosphere, I’m transported back to my debonair youth, circa 1973. It was here on the grass, so to speak, that I spent several miscalculated moments.

Regularly back then, there’d be a morning’s surf followed by the indispensable pre-lunch debriefing session in the office – a purpose-built cubbyhole within the Mangrove swamps surrounding Dee Why lagoon - Next, inspired by the munchies, several grommets and myself would set off to bridge the gap between hunger and nourishment, while at the same time narrowly avoiding golfer’s badly aimed balls as we crossed the Long Reef golf links. Triumphantly, we’d spill across Pittwater Road where our trek culminated in an encounter of the sumptuous kind always found when arriving at this baking oasis. Mesmerized by our good fortune we’d then glibly order the elegant trinity of meat, pastry and gravy. My lifelong admiration for the humble pie began on this very same council nature strip where I sat most recently. These days, my palette no longer being the anesthetized organ of taste it once was, I didn’t eat my fill of pies, sausage rolls, apple pies and cream horns. That, however, left a tendency afterwards to wander down Anzac Avenue for a stroll along Fisherman’s beach. With a smidgen of extra energy, or about half a chocolate éclair’s worth of kilojoules, one could easily ascend Long Reef headland for a spectacular view of the coast.

This shop, once known as Kerslakes, still radiated warmth and doting from the moment it appeared in my cross hairs. Mrs. Kerslake is still around, although the enterprising next generation of bakers now serve the patisserie’s evolution. Pies are categorized into chunky meat, beef or lamb. And ground beef or chicken’s breast or thigh. A vegetarian selection is also included. Each section has at least seven different types. The sausage roll, formidable during the Kerslakes epoch, now comes in two styles that have developed a refinement in their maturity. The outstanding pastry extends to apple pies and the chocolate éclair features the airiest choux imaginable. The unassuming vanilla slice unites ingredients into what is potentially one of the world’s great, though elusive, pastry combos. In lesser establishments this delicacy alternates between brightly-yellowed congealed travesties to saccharine sweet dross. The Upper Crust’s version displays a prowess and subtlety that is characteristic of every bakery item exiting from this popular Northern Beaches landmark. On one interior wall there are felt-tip marker pen endorsements from celebrities and pie loving folk the world over. Even a dog riding shotgun on the back of a builder’s truck barked as it swung by.